virtual crazy gang, part II

[Dartskipper]

Originally Posted by Engine Serang

This raises the question, the Ulster question; Are you one of our atheists or one of their's.

Myself I'm very much an A La Carte Christian. I would give it up completely but this is not the time to be making enemies.

They used to serve Christians A La Carte at that famous eatery "Cannibals Express."


Or was it Cannonball Express?

Anyroadup, a very Happy Christmas to all hands, no matter what they are holding on to.

[billyboy]

Must say, the old girl looks nice with that Christmas tree up the foremast. The red and green lights might be a bit confusing to some seafarers though.

[Varley]

Originally Posted by Engine Serang

This raises the question, the Ulster question; Are you one of our atheists or one of their's.

Myself I'm very much an A La Carte Christian. I would give it up completely but this is not the time to be making enemies.

Certainly an Anglican atheist. Despite a High Church upbringing (not at home but at School) I am more deeply suspicious of those employing the graven image than the plain totem. My then colleague Capt. Oztaskin I termed an Anglican Muslim. Both attending EB Carrier (recovering from various insults at Sembawang) he would join us for a bacon sandwich in the galley before 'work' and finished the day with a modest glass of Whisky. Except for the Prophet's Birthday when he was observant (in fact he was upset that he missed the date in Singapore and urgently 'phoned his wife to see if it had been declared the day after in Turkey = it being a 'when the moon is first sighted after' or some such gobbledegook). Nothing to complain of in that. I will also settle down to Carols from King's on 24th. It is at that time I will wish us all the compliments of the season and all the best for 2020. Until then...Bah Humbug!

[Varley]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Must say, the old girl looks nice with that Christmas tree up the foremast. The red and green lights might be a bit confusing to some seafarers though.

Thank heavens! I thought we'd collided head on with something woody with a cargo of baubles. "When a red you see in front.....

[Farmer John]

Our lights are based on the "whirling Mandala" of colours from Infra-red to Ultra-violet. Beautiful and awesome. Bearing in mind that we are in Lerwick, all lights are set to very low. Like a glowing ember and not a searchlight. Think of the Northern lights, not the set of Come Dancing. Something has just made me shudder.

[Tmac1720]

I know a joke about Come dancing but even I draw the line somewhere so won't tell it. Anyhoo I am distraught at the news from Norn Iron this Christmas. The annual nativity play has been cancelled up at Stormont...apparently they can't find three wise men and the search for a virgin has proved fruitless. The good news is there are plenty of ass (holes) available to fill a stable.

[Tmac1720]

Tell you what ES, let's you and me go down the pub, start a fight and bitch about the crew.... remind you of the good old Belfast Christmas spirit ??

[billyboy]

I,m not getting involved in that Tmac. You were so piscatorial last time you mistook me for one of the enemy. I still have the impression of a shifter on my head from that do!

[Farmer John]

This is fine though Sir William, since it says "King Dick" but reversed it is taken as an accolade from the last Ladys Sewing Circle you visited.

[billyboy]

Here it is. Vernier took me life with it so he did

[Engine Serang]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

Tell you what ES, let's you and me go down the pub, start a fight and bitch about the crew.... remind you of the good old Belfast Christmas spirit ??

Now that's what I call an invitation. A drink, a fight and the opportunity to bad-mouth Varley and all his mates. Sorry Mates.
Here's to us, who's like us, devil the one.

[Varley]

Good Old Belfast Christmas hooch - presumably just poteen aged over the twelve days that it took to smuggle it across the not-at-all-a-border. Me and my mate (your didn't mean the 's' did you?) will watch you oiks at fisticuffs from the civilised environment of the lounge bar. You know? if you were to have an unstained tie and clean socks you could join us.

[Tmac1720]

I don't wear socks, my feet are black enough already

[Varley]

You are right. Socks won't help you disguise those. Not quite as much an offence on the eye as they are on the nose.

[Engine Serang]

E S is sitting this one out.
In the hope nobody comments on his vest and pants.
I'm a bit more sensitive to ridicule than Tmax.

[Varley]

A vest and boilersuit. Isn't that as weedy as socks with sandals?

(Sensitive? As is the potato to the AVO!)

[Farmer John]

I'm in my Polar Bear onesie with red tartan sash, to hell with the rest of you. Sartorial elegance comes nowhere at Midwinter in Lerwick, the shipping forecast is endless rain,

[Dartskipper]

In that case, what you wear isn't an issue provided you also wear a sou'wester with a big brim.

[Engine Serang]

Originally Posted by Varley

A vest and boilersuit. Isn't that as weedy as socks with sandals?

(Sensitive? As is the potato to the AVO!)

And braces with bermuda's

[Engine Serang]

Originally Posted by Varley

Good Old Belfast Christmas hooch - presumably just poteen aged over the twelve days that it took to smuggle it across the not-at-all-a-border. Me and my mate (your didn't mean the 's' did you?) will watch you oiks at fisticuffs from the civilised environment of the lounge bar. You know? if you were to have an unstained tie and clean socks you could join us.

The Lounge Bar, there's posh.
Pay 25 pence a pint extra to drink with a bunch of social climbers and in IOM a bunch of embezzlers.

[YM-Mundrabilla]

Are we there yet?

It seems evident, even to those of us who rarely see daylight, and who are regularly issued with ever larger shovels in an attempt to increase steam pressure above 50 psi, that we seem to be meandering off course from time to time on our voyage to Lerwick. If we are not 'meandering' someone must be pinching the coal. We may even have to switch to nuclear at our current rate of progress.

Isn't Lerwick the home of Shetland ponies? Can we get a couple for Red's farm, perhaps?

Anyway whether we get there in time, not in time, or at all:

Best Wishes to you all for Christmas and the New Year !

Many of you can be assured, however, that those of us here 'down below' will have Christmas Dinner before you but there will be plenty of leftovers except for the Drambuie.

44 C on Friday 20/12 and 20 C the next day here in Melbourne! (supposedly 28 C on Christmas Day)

Geoff (YM)

[Engine Serang]

Its 40 C here in Lerwick, 40 degrees below zero with an icy hurricane blowing from the Steppes of Russia. Thermal underwear advised. My Memsahib is knitting willie warmers for the crew but Tesco have run out of wool.
Please forward size under plain cover.

[Engine Serang]

Wikapedia tells me;

Mundrabilla has a population of 23, 32% male and 68% female.

That's the sort of percentage I like. Mundrabilla here I come, 2020 could be a great year.

[Farmer John]

We have been docked for refit since 12/12/2019. Since our Mackerinery is so very quiet and our anti-roll bars so effective, some have not noticed. It's all there in the log.

[YM-Mundrabilla]

Log!

The last log that I saw was used for lighting up and whilst some of us live in the perpetual half dark I did notice that ES had departed for a visit to my old Home Depot of Mundrabilla where I spent all of a fortnight.

Probably too late as I believe that he was last seen in a tender (err lifeboat) from some fancy cruise boat heading north towards the coast in the Great Oz Bight. Do lifeboats (err tenders) carry extension ladders that he will need to scale the cliffs when he reaches the coast.

If, however, ES is determined to try Mundrabilla here is my Trip Adviser entry for him:

As a respected member of the GD’s Black Gang (are we allowed to bestow that honour these days?) ES might (or might not) fit in well at the Mundrabilla to which Wiki refers. I do think, however, that a closer analysis of the population statistics would be wise on his part. The 68% of 23 equals 15 and a half females but not sure what to make of this? The Wiki Mundrabilla referred to is the ‘township’ on the Eyre Highway near the Western Australian/South Australian border.

I only spent a few hours at Mundrabilla on the road 20 odd years ago enroute to the railway crossing loop at Mundrabilla on the Trans-Australian Railway some 123 km to the north where there had been a huge derailment. Most of population at the Roadhouse that night seemed 'insular', (to put it mildly). Lerwick sounds a better location to me. I have always fancied a White Christmas.

The sanest person encountered was an old rabbit trapper off the Nullarbor Plain. Everyone else I am sure was named Schmidt ‘I know nothing.’

The Trapper (who must have been a navigator in a former life) gave us precise directions to the railway across the flat, endless, treeless Plain which is criss-crossed by innumerable confusing tracks and is as featureless as the sea:

Back down the highway to the homestead; up the escarpment behind the homestead; follow the track to derelict water tank; half right for ## km; past the 44 gallon drum; and so on and so on. Half a page in precise and intimate detail.

Thankfully, it was a full moon and after ruining a tyre at around midnight it was with considerable relief that at 123 km exactly we sighted the red beacon for the aerodrome at Forrest. (Aircraft from the east coast to Perth and vice versa often stopped there for fuel back in the piston engine days.)

ES would have fitted in with the Breakdown Crew at the derailment I am sure but I am not so sure that the Mundrabilla Roadhouse population would have been to his, unknown to me, tastes.

Geoff
YM (Yardmaster Mundrabilla)