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#6276
1st June 2020, 10:14
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Sir W, I think you can let us each do his own bragging. Anyway are you sure the 'lassie' wasn't from Danny's?
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David V Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right It is the duty of the wealthy man To give employment to the artisan 
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#6277
1st June 2020, 11:14
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This ship is becoming a coven for old women gossiping, lets have no more of it. We have a treasure trove of manly stories, we should start telling them and let the rest be amazed.
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#6278
1st June 2020, 20:44
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It was a dark and a stormy night and the Captain said to the cabin boy "Tell us a tale!"
I forget the rest, or my mind has blanked it out.
__________________
Buvez toujours, mourrez jamais. Rabelais
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#6279
1st June 2020, 22:50
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Quote:
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"Imagination is more important than knowledge". A. Einstein. 
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#6280
2nd June 2020, 07:35
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The Bond has not been refreshed in living memory, nearly 3 months. We're all Covid 19 and have forgotten Vat 19. Priorities Gentlemen, Priorities. If we neglect our wellbeing we will loose our immunity to all sorts of diseases and it will end up with an umbrella up the big blue vein. Just typing it brings tears to my eyes. Be warned BB.
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#6281
2nd June 2020, 12:37
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I prefer a good Vat 69 myself, well except for when I get some hair stuck between my teeth.
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Oul scabby knuckles  If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried Anything God didn't create was made by engineers. I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots 
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#6282
2nd June 2020, 13:17
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Gentlemen normally take them out and put them in a glass on the bedside locker. Be nice, T.
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#6283
2nd June 2020, 14:14
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Quote:
 Tip from a professional, ALWAYS keep the teeth in, much better to nibble than suck
__________________
Oul scabby knuckles If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried Anything God didn't create was made by engineers. I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots
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#6284
3rd June 2020, 10:29
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Shipmates Good News..... Tmax has invited us down to the Changing Room for drinks and nibbles at, at sex, which is 18.00 hrs on the H&W clock. On past performance it could descend into a bit of a swarry so be sure to get an Access All Areas badge.
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#6285
3rd June 2020, 13:33
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Tmax. Are we talking of heat engines or do we just expect hot stuff? With your grasp of efficiency I expect Tmin would be too hot!
(And might I add your advice about my teeth and the bedside locker - that porcelain there is not meant as a denture quencher, can't you tell by its size?)
__________________
David V Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right It is the duty of the wealthy man To give employment to the artisan Last edited by Varley; 3rd June 2020 at 13:41.
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#6286
3rd June 2020, 16:44
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Varley dear lad, not to worry the latent heat from the injuns is ducted up the big pole thingie at the front with the lights on it, to keep the crow warm in its nest and to defrost the lights.
All you require is a super sized tub of Vaseline and the world is your lobster. Please don't confuse that with a tub of Chockfast otherwise you might be in for a sticky end.
__________________
Oul scabby knuckles If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried Anything God didn't create was made by engineers. I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots
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#6287
3rd June 2020, 17:11
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I've seen you shimmy Chief and while you can still do that I'll keep the Chockfast red-pencilled.
I may have misunderstood E-S. The porcelain container would be OK for keeping one's hair in I suppose but it would then not only look ridiculous in the morning but might not smell too good either. And another thing! Vaseline is no good for crabs. Not unless you set it on fire after application.
__________________
David V Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right It is the duty of the wealthy man To give employment to the artisan
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#6288
3rd June 2020, 19:21
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Did you hear about the couple who didn't know the difference between Vaseline and putty?
All their windows fell out.
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#6289
4th June 2020, 00:02
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The stuffs no good in place of puttee either - the boots fall off.
__________________
David V Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right It is the duty of the wealthy man To give employment to the artisan
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#6290
4th June 2020, 06:21
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And Ypres mud will get into the turn-ups in your trousers.
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#6292
5th June 2020, 06:32
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Quote:
I'll just have a coffee (and three Drambuies to go with it, please, seeing as you are paying ). Geoff (YM)  
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#6293
5th June 2020, 10:58
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Happy Birthday Boss, I trust the memsahib has a treat in store for you but failing that a libation or three can be had in the injun room. Admittance gained upon receipt of the secret knock
__________________
Oul scabby knuckles If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried Anything God didn't create was made by engineers. I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots
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#6294
5th June 2020, 13:10
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Sir W. Have as many more of them as you yourself can tolerate. Here I have festively wrapped this big tub of Vaseline, I've only used a teeny bit.
Ignore Tmac, that secret knock is coming from the crankcase.
__________________
David V Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right It is the duty of the wealthy man To give employment to the artisan
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#6295
5th June 2020, 14:34
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DON'T USE THE VASELINE It's a trap, Varley put sand in it
 Hoi, my injuns don't knock they humm gently like a satisfied cat
__________________
Oul scabby knuckles If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried Anything God didn't create was made by engineers. I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots
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#6296
5th June 2020, 15:28
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Quote:
Almost unanimous. Mostly unanimous. In fact blood has been spilt during discussions. But we settled things with an evening in Hatfield House.
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#6297
5th June 2020, 16:04
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Sir William, have a good day, I am lifting a glass to you. A pint mug of Champagne half and half with Guinness is most acceptable for a birthday tipple.
__________________
Buvez toujours, mourrez jamais. Rabelais
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#6298
5th June 2020, 16:05
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For the mathematically challenged, that makes 2 pints or a quart.
__________________
Buvez toujours, mourrez jamais. Rabelais
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#6299
5th June 2020, 18:17
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Rounded up to half a gallon.
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#6300
6th June 2020, 10:04
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Why stop at that? Let's make it a full Gallon.
__________________
Buvez toujours, mourrez jamais. Rabelais
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