virtual crazy gang, part II

[Varley]

'Gays unintentionally' - A club for those not quite 'out'? Anyway, that would appear to be wine trodden for gays not by them. But what a kind thought.

I do rather think, however, we should draw the line at horses regardless of how open-minded E-S would have us.

Spectrum? ZX or does he have an electromagnetic personality? (Note. Yet more Leckie levity there).

[billyboy]

Not been there since the Mid 60's ES so I admit to being out of touch.

[Engine Serang]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Not been there since the Mid 60's ES so I admit to being out of touch.

Obviously you still have memories of some Hampshire Floozie with a deep cleavage and heart of gold.

[billyboy]

Originally Posted by Engine Serang

Obviously you still have memories of some Hampshire Floozie with a deep cleavage and heart of gold.

From what I can recall (as I was rather inebriated at the time) she had been around the block a few times. Kept her teeth in her handbag!

[Engine Serang]

A perfect lady, no teeth and bites her nails.

[billyboy]

Originally Posted by Engine Serang

A perfect lady, no teeth and bites her nails.

ha ha ha! soton sue I think she was called.

[Engine Serang]

I warned youse this would happen.

[Malcolm G]

Shush ES, you’ll wake ‘em up.

[Varley]

Who do I ask about bringing a guest onboard? My never done well (nor do we expect him ever to) nephew is threatening to join me, uninvited, for Christmas.

(He tells me that he wants to show me his car. I have told him that we have cars over here and only those in Foxdale would be frightened by his horseless carriage but that does not seem to have swayed him. Yet, I am still trying).

[Engine Serang]

Your neer-do-well relation will hondoubtly have a palate educated by burgers and chips, washed down with "Bud". Feeding him won't be a problem. You could have problems with the good people of Foxdale as they are aware of two wheeled horseless carriages speeding thro Peel every year.

[Engine Serang]

Probably not the correct forum but I noticed at the State Banquet last night KC III offered his guests Taylor's Vintage Port 1983, could the Earl of Laxey comment on the choice? Naturally I am taking it as given that the Noble Lord was in attendance.

[Varley]

HM was kind enough to accept my apologies (well, I am sure he would have). I was, anyway, at John Taylor's last evening for a 'do' with HM's local rep. (I was not introduced but hope to be on the 1st, at another 'do'. I was on teasing terms with the last fella, decent type).

As for vintage port you should not ask a dedicated alcoholic, when it comes to port we only take the cheap stuff. It is our cognac habit that is prohibitive. I have just taken a delivery of a case of colheita, Calem 2010 (Eur 20.6, delivery 19.0 but I expect a GBP 90 bill from DHL for customs formalities). Even that is a bit too pricey for everyday so I topped off today with three bottles of Sainsbury's Tawny when doing the weekly shopping.

I am not sure if it is not really my pocket talking but I prefer BS Tawny to vintage - they are different drinks but I am sure HM's guests will not have held this minor deficiency against him).

(Nothing about my nephew is educated despite the efforts of his grandfather. Brother hated proper school and swore his son would not have to endure it. A grave error of judgement (or perhaps a careful budgetary outlook, the music of a distant drum is sometimes a true tune unappreciated).

[rustytrawler]

I once went out with a girl from the I.O.M. i used to call her eggtimer she used to turn over after three minutes

[billyboy]

met a girl from there once. her name was Martini ...... Any time any place anywhere.

[Engine Serang]

Martini? I always preferred Hull Brewery Bitter.

[Malcolm G]

None of your wussy cock’s tail stuff round here.

[Varley]

Much is told of visits to Peel.

(Not much of a valet, that. Obviously never mixed his employer a decent pick-me-up).

[Varley]

Have we been swapping the Walport boxes with GD I? Some of the scribbles on the paper-work in this box suggest their humour was aired there first.

[Tmac1720]

My apologies crew type persons for only keeping a watching brief from the bridge these last few weeks. Was dry docked for a bottom scrape and tubes blown as well but I can hear the injun room calling or maybe its just ES with his finger stuck in the injector again. Squeek and Eric assure me all is in order down below however I have absolutely no interest in their neither regions as I have more than enough crap to deal with of my own. Perhaps Lord Varley would look kindly upon a DBE and offer some sanctuary in his palatial castle on the IOM. (just asking like)

* DBE = Distressed bloody engineer and NOT Dickhead of the British Empire although I qualify on both counts.

[Varley]

A mere Dogsbody of the order? Had that been a K or, at a pinch, an O I would have had no hesitation in offering you a place at my table (which, as you know, often hosts gentry). But as a shipmate I would, of course, always offer a bed (not usually mine unless you are much prettier than I suspect) as long as you don't mind taking your meals in servants' hall.

You shouldn't worry about taking up my nephew's berth. I wouldn't put you in the stables*.

Trust the drydocking went well and none of the nurses pulled rank as Dame of the Boilng Enema, or if they did they didn't qualify on you anyway.

(Sorry that is being sexist. The order of the Boiling Enema must now include Nights too).

*However familiar you are with such accommodations.

[Engine Serang]

IOM is a discrete spot to convalesce from the plague, black death, para typhoid or a weepy willie but a manly affliction requiring lignum vitae is best served near home. Suggest a caravan in Ballywalter or a genteel guest house in Portstewart.

[Engine Serang]

Originally Posted by Varley

Have we been swapping the Walport boxes with GD I? Some of the scribbles on the paper-work in this box suggest their humour was aired there first.

Few of your random jottings are freshly minted but then the Upper Chamber was never famed for its wit and repartee. Perhaps you, yourself, full of the tawney devil fiddled with said paperwork.

[Varley]

A water lubricated jobbie eh? That'll be a shock to the system. Apropos that area in particular, lady at lunch on Friday experienced a very high throughput there a week or so ago - returned from the Rose red City with cholera -can't imagine that would have been considered non-polluting.

(My muse is not the tawny. When I need genius it's gin - but not with Jordanian ice!).

[Engine Serang]

Watching a fair bit of the World Cup last week. Denmark v France was a cracker, Wales a one man band, England looking as if they caught long covid and Ireland ( N,S,E or W) not featuring. But tell me what Group did IOM qualify in?

[Varley]

You will have to ask someone who gives a tinker's cuss (that is about soccer, not god's own rock).

If there's a union flag on their colours I wish 'em the winners. Providing they do not do the knee thing or the gag thing or the being rude to the hosts things.