virtual crazy gang, part II

[Tmac1720]

Currently in dry dock for bottom scrape so kindly do NOT mention arses. Further chopping up scheduled for Monday so if you don't hear from me by Tuesday I'm dead.

Should the worst happen and with my luck I'd expect feck all else, Squeek will continue as standby Chief while Eric works on his steam ticket.

Sorry YM nobody but NOBODY touches my namtomic thingybobs, I invented the GD's warp drive and Guinness reactor so just you carry on shovelling coal in the boiler bit.

[billyboy]

Ahoy Tom, Best of luck good sir. If I go before you I'll be waiting for you up in the heavenly bar.

[rustytrawler]

Eyup Tmac i hope all goes well for you, if it goes wrong try looking up Singapore Sadie.....good luck to you and yours regards rustytrawler.

[YM-Mundrabilla]

Jawohl mein Führer. Your wish is my command.
Good luck for Monday.

[Engine Serang]

The Royal College of Nursing has issued a red alert for the Royal Victoria Hospital in Belfast; "Beware, Tmax Approaching".
Nurses of a nervous or prim & proper disposition are advised to "Go Sick" for the duration of Tmax's stay.

[Varley]

Didn't Nanny tell you that scraping it only makes it worse?

(I'll take it I can keep the Bahco and the three cell Brightstar if no news come Wednesday).

[Engine Serang]

Brightstar and MSA gear are made in Mumbai so keep the useless yellow thing. The Bahco is worth stealing so join the queue matey.

I'm not a harsh or unfeeling person but if Tmax had taken All Bran , as he was ordered, instead of an Ulster Fry he wouldn't have to have his tailshaft pulled. Solpadene for the Chief.

[rustytrawler]

I find it distasteful that you are dividing Tmax's belongings up before he has gone, but what i did notice was that he has a brand new pair of hush puppies size 9, it just so happens that i take a 9 and have wrote my name inside them and hope to wear them at a wedding next week but if he does return he can gladly have them back....hope all goes well Tmac

[billyboy]

come on Tmc, you got this mate. we need you to get your telegram from the King mate.
oh and the Engine room livestock needs feeding up. starting to get a bit thin.

Best wishes for a full recovery. Irene and Bill.

[Varley]

I chinesed along with my recent boss and others of the usual suspects last night (much enjoyed by all - Chinatown for those interested).

If one wants to be committed to a nice restful hospital ward then he reckons watching Titanic 2 is a fine way to achieve that end. Whether Tmax's end has been put into a sling because he caught some of it has now to be a possibility. A truth from which he may be hiding.

Rather like Triangle I suspect- when I had done something nasty I made myself watch an episode. When I was really despicable I made myself watch two.

[tweediekiwi]

Tmac, I don't know you but have been reading about your adventures for years here. Please get well soon. Healing wishes all the from Pahiatua, New Zealand !!

[Engine Serang]

Tmax, your chest must be swollen with pride from all the good wishes of our Colonial and Commonwealth'ey shipmates.
I have not wished you well on these pages because, being a local, I intend dropping in this evening to raise your spirits. And speaking of spirits I will have a Red Cross parcel consisting of a bunch of grapes and a bottle of Lucozade. The Lucozade will naturally, be heavily adulterated with Black Bush and you'll be firing on all cylinders by Wednesday.
PS, I've given the Surgeon the Poker Gauge to measure your weardown and we will chance our arm by applying to be exempt the next drydocking. Double full ahead.

[Tmac1720]

Thanks shipmates for the good wishes, they really are much appreciated by this grumpy old fart. Well have you lot ever met a Chief Injuneer that wasn't a grumpy sod? thought not.

The good news is my tail shaft was not extracted much to ES's disappointment but as for my chest swelling, wrong part of my anatomy mate, NO bits of me swell anymore and even if one bit resurrected itself I wouldn't know what to do with it.

Nasty bit removed and sent to the Lab for analysis, must be a really clever dog to be that skilled but never fear I still have nastiness in aplenty to keep you scurvy mob in check. Squeek has provided daily reports on your nefarious activities so have no doubt I have all your cards marked. See you soon, very soon.

[rustytrawler]

Well done Tmac and all the best, Iwas going to look after your Hush puppies if you crocked but now i will have to buy a pair....can you see your way clear to loan me £50, i can pay you back at 50p a week thank you in antisipation.

[OLDGIT77]

Been there . had camera up my posterior 3 times .
bits removed and sent to the Lab for analysis.
Removed Polyps .
found i had a twisted bowel ..

What is it with camera,s .
also down my throat twice .
Once up my whatsit , found i have enlarged prostate and bladder .
Altrascan twice

Said to Doctor they have done everything else but not checked my brain , his reply
was he can arrange that .
Have had 3 heart attacks / double by-pass .
work related mining accident / fell 70 feet off ledge / spine dropped 2 inchs / only
3% feeling in legs / feet .
not much more can go wrong .
coming to age 78 end of this month / sounds like i am falling apart . ha.ha

All the best / take care . Tmac1720

Tony

[Varley]

Bugger. I put the weekly allowance on the undertaker at 3:1. Now someone else will have to buy the fizz at Friday Lunch.

Next time I'll hedge with a Yankee including Oldgit.

(Actually, despite Pa trying to explain it, I am no gambler. It did get me interested in secondary cells however).

[billyboy]

yeah no Joke getting old. Its like being punished for a crime we have not committed.

[OLDGIT77]

Originally Posted by Varley

Bugger. I put the weekly allowance on the undertaker at 3:1. Now someone else will have to buy the fizz at Friday Lunch.

Next time I'll hedge with a Yankee including Oldgit.

(Actually, despite Pa trying to explain it, I am no gambler. It did get me interested in secondary cells however).

Hi . Varley;53053 .

Also never a betting man .
My Uncle Douglas breed race horses and racing greyhounds , told me to
bet on one of his greyhounds , my reply was he treats them like pets so would not win .
If i had bet on it would have been £150 better off as it came in first .
Greyhound was called " WIMPEY GIRL " as his wife my auntie Margaret
owned 3 Wimpey Bars ,

All the best .

Tony

[OLDGIT77]

Originally Posted by billyboy

yeah no Joke getting old. Its like being punished for a crime we have not committed.

Hi . billyboy .

[ yeah no Joke getting old.]

I sometimes think there is someone with a Voodoo Doll with
my likeness sticking pins in it . ha,ha .

All the best , take care .

Tony

[Malcolm G]

My experience of NHS and GPs:

Apart from the regular jabs for 'flu and covid, which they do at the ferry terminal rather than one of their super surgeries.

2003: "I have pains in my chest".
It's just stress, here's some pills, keep an eye on your blood pressure.
2011: "My blood pressure seems high".
No, it's not, don't worry about it.
2018: "I recently returned from a long trip, I have all the signs and symptons of DVT".
Oh, so you do, but it's not, don't worry about it.

Present day: I find that one does not even get to see a GP nowadays.
Log on to your account, you'll then need to set up a different type of account to make an appointment then someone will review it and get back to make a telephone appointment with someone who may or may not be a GP.

I've decided to go with the previous advice - Go away and don't worry about it.

[OLDGIT77]

Years ago as a kid you had a family Doctor who knew all the family and their
medical history [ no computers ] plus home visits if needed .

Nowadays you see a Locum / doctor and its potluck who you see , not always
the same one and he spends 5-10 minutes looking up your medical records on
the computer before he gets around to you .

Take care .

Tony

[Engine Serang]

Good article in Wednesday's Times by Ben Elton about an anti drinking campaign that said even moderate drinking will knock two years off your life.
They don't tell you which two years.
Its the last two, the rubbish two, the two you spend not recognising your kids and having to be taken to the toilet.
As far as Ben Elton is concerned he's happy to sacrifice those years for some good claret and I'm of similar mind. Lets all head to the pub this evening and have a feed of pints, a few glasses of Prosecco and a Black Bush nightcap.
Cheers.

[rustytrawler]

Sounds good to me, can we bring our carers with us as once i have had two pints i need guidance to go for a leek, sometimes up to four times a pint....just call me piss quick.

[YM-Mundrabilla]

ES,
One of your better ideas.
Happy to forego any rubbish years.
Every dog has his day .......

[Varley]

Foreign fizz? Henners is the stuff. Support your local sheriff (or at least the compliant sheriff that is closest to you). Quite up to snuff without the need for your vile habit of adding tincture of bothiebath to everything.

I wonder, though, if it is not the drink but the moderation that is responsible for the prematurity of undertaking expenditure.

The actuaries waste their talents on calculations of mortality. There is no outcome that is not 100% (the assertion of a cleverish friend whose funeral I attended last week. Fortunately I lack the ambition to prove my arguments so convincingly).