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virtual crazy gang, part II

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  #1251  
Old 23rd August 2017, 17:12
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FJ just yank (yes I spelt that correctly ) on the handbrake.... but be careful you don't end up biting the taffrail.... WE stop..YOU don't
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  #1252  
Old 23rd August 2017, 17:52
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FJ just yank (yes I spelt that correctly ) on the handbrake.... but be careful you don't end up biting the taffrail.... WE stop..YOU don't
Really, Tmac, you are not a great deal of help. I had forgotten about the remote control, I just knocked the speed down and we coasted up to the Port side. Problem solved, but not helped by you shying Pork-pies at us and shouting "Luvverly pies, get 'em down you".

Madamgrasscar spotted on the starboard, we have set course for Richard's Bay, we will go to anchor till we speak to The Man With The Brown Envelope, then I think we will have to either go in as a bulker or disguise ourselves as a new Wharf, using the bits we picked up in Chittagong. Anyway, about 900 miles to go, then we are on the 'ook for a bit.
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  #1253  
Old 24th August 2017, 17:39
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Steady away, anyone fancy a drink? My Shout (that should bring them out).
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  #1254  
Old 24th August 2017, 19:12
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Gallump Gallump... GALLUMP... puff pant.... somebody mention drink?.... pint of Black Bush please and put a cherry in it as I feel a tad hungry ( I was going to say fruity but realised the connotations)
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I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots
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  #1255  
Old 24th August 2017, 21:10
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A pint of the Blackest, 2 cherries and a slice of pineapple and to hell with the connotations, we don't need to generate any electricity right now anyway.
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  #1256  
Old 25th August 2017, 04:47
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Free Bar!! stand back....let me through...Pint of draught Guiness please steward and stick a couple of large scotches in it.
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  #1257  
Old 25th August 2017, 09:21
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Free Bar!! stand back....let me through...Pint of draught Guiness please steward and stick a couple of large scotches in it.
Ah, Sir William, you are going for the nutrition as well. Stewart, beat an egg into the Guiness before you serve it. I'll have a couple of Scotch eggs, please. Oh, and a pint of scrumpy, full of vitamins. It is breakfast time.
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  #1258  
Old 25th August 2017, 19:02
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Farmer John, very friendly of you I'll have a double Gripe'n French if I may.
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  #1259  
Old 26th August 2017, 00:21
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Steward!! my glass is almost empty.....Another if you please and keep them coming.
Oh a nice thick slice of that Pork pie with the egg in it also.
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  #1260  
Old 26th August 2017, 10:13
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I'll have a top up too please plastic. By the by any idea why the galley want all those ping pong balls?
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Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light
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  #1261  
Old 26th August 2017, 10:37
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I'll have a top up too please plastic. By the by any idea why the galley want all those ping pong balls?
Tmac is putting them through the debigulator to make some experimental tapioca.
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  #1262  
Old 26th August 2017, 12:11
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We are nearly at the anchorage for Richard's Bay. If we get some of the wayhay! Of the ship, we can drop the hook, set an anchor watch and wait for the clearances we need. Could be a day or so's wait for TMWTBE.
Speed down to .5 knots, let go Starboard anchor, someone grab the chain if it isn't fixed on. Dab of astern. Right, take bearings and set GPS alarm, all serene-oh.

Anyone for deck quoits?
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  #1263  
Old 26th August 2017, 20:59
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Sir William, now the gangway is rigged, should we launch your tender?
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  #1264  
Old 27th August 2017, 00:29
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well it is Sunday, think we should give thanks to the great Admiral above, perhaps in the PAX Lounge.
Farmer John you may take the service. Tmac will play the organ, Varley the collection and our female crew can be the celestial choir.
Oh Dont forget the wine, cheese and crackers at half time.
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  #1265  
Old 27th August 2017, 18:07
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Sir William, I have decided many years ago that I am not worthy to pretend to communicate with a being who has made snowflakes and such marvels. All fasten your thoughts on the amazing world we live in and aspire not to F**K it up any more than we can help. Place a contribution in the receptacle Varley will pass amongst you with, change for a trouser button is not £9.99. All the proceeds will be spent, and the receiver will be very grateful. If Tmac misunderstands the call to play the organ, please avert your eyes, engineers think that kind of thing is funny.

Our female members of crew seem to have been so appalled by our noxious behaviour that they are ashore, being gracious in their own way.

After 30 minutes, change ends after a quick snack.
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Last edited by Farmer John; 27th August 2017 at 18:41.
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  #1266  
Old 28th August 2017, 01:22
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Right...get the launch over the wall. Lets go exploring this place.
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  #1267  
Old 28th August 2017, 12:35
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If Tmac misunderstands the call to play the organ, please avert your eyes, engineers think that kind of thing is funny.
MOI ??? you know me sooooooo well My prowess on my organ is renowned throughout the civilised and not so civilised world... in fact it is so good I've named it Wurlitzer many recipients of such an experience have gone away their lives forever changed as is frequently their gait

Incidentally and point of information, injuneers don't have a weird sense of humour, it's simply you lot don't understand the joke
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  #1268  
Old 28th August 2017, 14:39
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Right...get the launch over the wall. Lets go exploring this place.
Sir William wants to launch his launch, stand from under, ok chaps, swing 'er out and let 'er go........

Oh dear.

Right then.

Which one of you forgot to put the bung back in then ?
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  #1269  
Old 28th August 2017, 16:18
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Sir W merits a barge don't 'ee? All same an admirable
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Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light
Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right
It is the duty of the wealthy man
To give employment to the artisan
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  #1270  
Old 28th August 2017, 17:02
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Sir William wants to launch his launch, stand from under, ok chaps, swing 'er out and let 'er go........

Oh dear.

Right then.

Which one of you forgot to put the bung back in then ?
I think the sad fact is, we all did. Never mind, she is like the James Bond Lotus, but with a cockpit full of sea. Blow the ballast tanks. Thank goodness for mushy peas, just leave the windows open, we can drop the top later.
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  #1271  
Old 28th August 2017, 17:53
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Boat, barge, raft..... whatever.... well I'm NOT fixing it, I've enough to do playing with my organ.
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Oul scabby knuckles

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

Anything God didn't create was made by engineers.

I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots
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  #1272  
Old 29th August 2017, 02:22
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Boat, barge, raft..... whatever.... well I'm NOT fixing it, I've enough to do playing with my organ.
he was not deriving pleaure from it. He was cleaning it and it went off!
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  #1273  
Old 29th August 2017, 17:18
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Hoist out Barge for Sir William Bilgerat, replace plug and lower away gently. See, who says we never learn? Make fast alongside the gangway, ready for use.

Hoist away, the launch is now empty but needs a bit of drying out. Stow her on the after deck and the sun can gently do the job.

All ready for shore trip, Sir Wiliam, please don't wait too long, the horse has only 2 hours of air and it is a fair way for Dobbin to walk.
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  #1274  
Old 30th August 2017, 14:18
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What the..... My Launch!!

Get my speed boat up out of the hold and lower that in. Something about the sound of a V8 Detroit excites me.
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  #1275  
Old 30th August 2017, 16:07
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Will do Sir William, as soon as we get the horse back to the surface, rubbed down and into the pressure chamber. We have to send him back soon, we don't want him getting the bends.
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