virtual crazy gang, part II

[Tmac1720]

Originally Posted by PatriciaAnnT

Isn't it nice that we can get back to offending each other again? I've missed it so.

Oh God what did I do or say now? maybe it would be best if I just stay down the pit permanently if I appear to annoy people that much

[Dartskipper]

Originally Posted by PatriciaAnnT

I've never cared for the Plastic Stewards. They're a bit too uppity for me. They've got a "tude". But, I'll let them bring me my morning champers. Who is cooking these days? I'd love sit out on the deck with a strong cup of coffee with proper cream and a bacon sarnie.

Have to be careful with stewards, especially those of the bar type.

Bacon Sarnie with cream? Sounds like a great cure for imbibing too much champers.

[Dartskipper]

Originally Posted by Tom Alexander

You don't need to fuss so much with the navigation -- we managed to purloin the magic compass from Captain Jack Sparrow's "Black Pearl' -- all we do is wish where we want to go and it takes us right there. (Mind you we do slyly take azimuths of the moon to make sure of it's deviation as the only deviation allowed on board is by the crew members themselves.

Thanks for the heads up on that Tom. I was only going to take noon sights anyway, I'm scared of the dark.

Now Sir William has promoted everybody, I'll have to raid Granny's ditty bag again for more gold coloured decorations I suppose.

[Dartskipper]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

Oh God what did I do or say now? maybe it would be best if I just stay down the pit permanently if I appear to annoy people that much

We can make appropriate arrangements to smuggle you up on deck incognito if needed. A clean seaman's jersey, a false beard and a pair of sunglasses should do the trick. Start practising a Welsh accent to throw any antagonists off the scent. (Damn, I forgot about the aroma of diesel fumes and hot oil that follow every injuneer around. Copious applications of Black Bush internally should produce a suitable amount of fumes to counter any oily niffs.)

OK boyo?

[Dartskipper]

Originally Posted by Tom Alexander

Ah! Red-17 -- please report to the bridge to fill in the log book and as this is a totally politically incorrect vessel, you can also keep Myself, Dartskipper, and Farmer John supplied with alcoholic beverages as required. (No reason why you can't keep yourself supplied as well -- the bridge works better as a well oiled machine!) There is another log, which is streamed from the taffrail when under way and referred to as the Walker's Submerged Log -- a propeller type thingy rotating a measuring device which records the distance run during any time period. You will be asked to record the readings on the device, usually around noon each day.

Steering the ship is easier when the hand on the helm is heavily lubricated. If you see two hazards directly ahead, you just steer between them.

Left hand down a bit helmsman.

[Dartskipper]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Ships Notice board:
Promotions list.
Tom. now official senior master.
Dartskipper. now senior Captain.
Farmer John. official first mate.
Pats. senior Boatswain
Red-17 official ships log keeper (log only to be used as required by OOW) to assist Sister Eleff if and when required.
Varley communications officer. the finer wines and cigars for favors still required.
YM-Mundrabilla. Official 2nd engineer.
CED. remains as Engineering supervisor when she returns from leave
Sister Eleff. sick bay technician first class
Coastie. Anchovy chef, when he gets back
Billyboy. eccentric owner with more money than sense.
Tmac. all things injuniering (I dare not ask more of that man)

Vacancys:
4 AB's
1 sailmaker. (well you never know if we might need a homeward bounder)

Much appreciate very sudden and unexpected promotion Billyboy. Glad to see Red-17 is designated log keeper. It's vital that somebody conserves solid fuel for the stoves in the mess decks if the trunk ventilation circulators break down. There must be some pier head jumps or spare hands waiting to jump ship from the other site to fill the AB's positions. I see Tom explaining the use of the Walker log in his post. Mine's a double Johnnie Walker Black Label if the barman would like to add it to his log of drinks not yet paid for?

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

'morning Pats, I hope you have by now discovered the champagne chiller installed in your wardrobe.... no need for thanks just a welcome home present

Where's mine Tmac? You never know, but with a chiller in my cabin, you just might be invited in for drinkies.

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by Red-17

ASSISTANT! Who is head gardener?? You're winding me up billyboy and it is not a pretty sight when you do that.: mad:

Sorry billyboy, I seem to be a little tense at present and not behaving as courteously as I normally do. I am more than happy to keep the Ships log and assist whomever is head gardener.

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

Oh God what did I do or say now? maybe it would be best if I just stay down the pit permanently if I appear to annoy people that much

Tmac, you know we all luvs ya and couldn't do without you. Please just make sure though that you use the right oil in your engines. (See report today on error with Australian warships.) I should think heads might roll. We would not want to get stuck in harbour in Tahiti, now would we?

[Red-17]

[QUOTE=billyboy;852]Ships Notice board:
Promotions list.

Red-17 official ships log keeper (log only to be used as required by OOW) to assist Sister Eleff if and when required.

Is it safe for me to assume that OOW means Officer On Watch?

[billyboy]

[QUOTE=Red-17;987]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Ships Notice board:
Promotions list.

Red-17 official ships log keeper (log only to be used as required by OOW) to assist Sister Eleff if and when required.

Is it safe for me to assume that OOW means Officer On Watch?

Correct! well done you are learning fast Red-17.

[billyboy]

Morning Tom. I am a bit puzzled by that strange signal flying from the yard arm.
Ah, female undies drying eh....jolly good, carry on, very colourful too!

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Morning Tom. I am a bit puzzled by that strange signal flying from the yard arm.
Ah, female undies drying eh....jolly good, carry on, very colourful too!

Sorry billyboy, not sure if they are mine or Pats. I will check with the head gardener to see if there is space for a line for us to dry our 'smalls' on.

[PatriciaAnnT]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

Oh God what did I do or say now? maybe it would be best if I just stay down the pit permanently if I appear to annoy people that much

No, no. Just some of my edgy humour.

[PatriciaAnnT]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

'morning Pats, I hope you have by now discovered the champagne chiller installed in your wardrobe.... no need for thanks just a welcome home present

What a lovely gesture. Thank you. I hope you found the very large box of crayons, including the newest colours, reams of paper and one of those scissors with the round tips so you don't hurt yourself. There is only one person on board that enjoys the sight of blood. Red will be sharpening needles for her in days to come.

Again, thank you for the lovely welcome.

[PatriciaAnnT]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Morning Tom. I am a bit puzzled by that strange signal flying from the yard arm.
Ah, female undies drying eh....jolly good, carry on, very colourful too!

They ain't mine.

[Tom Alexander]

Originally Posted by Red-17

OK billyboy, if that is what you want me to do then I will not disobey. However, this is twice that I have been denied the position of gardener. I am beginning to think that there is something in the garden that is SO secret that I can't be trusted with it.

Is it Varley's secret stash of booze or Tmacs secret entrance for 'nubile young women' into the injun room. Or is it a secret crop of ?????. If it is the latter it is no wonder the mules goes berserk every now and then.

Also: Please explain TANNOY.

Please do not be too upset -- the garden, known as Mary's garden was first established by Mary and she turned a plain ordinary deck into the lush profusion of rare vegetables, trees, shrubs, lawns and flowers that we enjoy today. It was when her garden reached it's full profusion that Mary's husband passed away and she left the ship, I understand to grieve and get her real life together. Actually to be her assistant is to bestowed a great honour.

TANNOY is actually a Yankee expression for a ship's public announcement system.

[YM-Mundrabilla]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Morning Tom. I am a bit puzzled by that strange signal flying from the yard arm.
Ah, female undies drying eh....jolly good, carry on, very colourful too!

I thought initially, from a distance of course, that they may have been some sort of maneuvering signal however I now realise from closer examination that I was mistaken.

[Tom Alexander]

Originally Posted by billyboy

Morning Tom. I am a bit puzzled by that strange signal flying from the yard arm.
Ah, female undies drying eh....jolly good, carry on, very colourful too!

Sir William --- I think i recognise them as belonging to Mary -- either she has snuck back aboard without telling us, or someone found them in their cabin.

[Tom Alexander]

Originally Posted by Dartskipper

Much appreciate very sudden and unexpected promotion Billyboy. Glad to see Red-17 is designated log keeper. It's vital that somebody conserves solid fuel for the stoves in the mess decks if the trunk ventilation circulators break down. There must be some pier head jumps or spare hands waiting to jump ship from the other site to fill the AB's positions. I see Tom explaining the use of the Walker log in his post. Mine's a double Johnnie Walker Black Label if the barman would like to add it to his log of drinks not yet paid for?

Johnnie Walker Black ---- Why would someone want to imbibe such Glaswegian paint thinner when Farmer John has 18 year old Laphroaig in his stores??

When I come up to the bridge I'll show you where Farmer John and I keep our private stash of Four Bells ---- (An artfully hidden compartment in the Chartroom Table.) Must remember to show Red where that is too.

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by Tom Alexander

Please do not be too upset -- the garden, known as Mary's garden was first established by Mary and she turned a plain ordinary deck into the lush profusion of rare vegetables, trees, shrubs, lawns and flowers that we enjoy today. It was when her garden reached it's full profusion that Mary's husband passed away and she left the ship, I understand to grieve and get her real life together. Actually to be her assistant is to bestowed a great honour.

TANNOY is actually a Yankee expression for a ship's public announcement system.

Thank you Tom, I realise that now, however I have wanted to work in the garden for sometime and as Mary is away it is starting to look a tad overgrown in places. It would be lovely to have it all ship shape and Bristol fashion as I am sure Mary would like it to be. Also, I think that Pat's hens have made a roost for themselves in there somewhere and I would like to find them before the cook does. If I need an extra pair of hands or two to round them up who would you suggest?

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by PatriciaAnnT

They ain't mine.

If they ain't yours and they ain't mine??? Um, we ARE the only females on board at present, aren't we

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by Tom Alexander

Johnnie Walker Black ---- Why would someone want to imbibe such Glaswegian paint thinner when Farmer John has 18 year old Laphroaig in his stores??

When I come up to the bridge I'll show you where Farmer John and I keep our private stash of Four Bells ---- (An artfully hidden compartment in the Chartroom Table.) Must remember to show Red where that is too.

Your secret stash of whuskey is safe with me, I can't stand the stuff, not even the smell of it! Yuk.

[Tom Alexander]

Well we've worn out our welcome in Pape'ete -- We've been banned from all the bars, Mothers are furious, daughters delighted. Blue Peter at the hoist -- departing at 14:00 hours tomorrow, right after breakfast. Thought we could head for Auckland and get to talk to people who speak English (sort of) again.

[Red-17]

Originally Posted by Tom Alexander

Well we've worn out our welcome in Pape'ete -- We've been banned from all the bars, Mothers are furious, daughters delighted. Blue Peter at the hoist -- departing at 14:00 hours tomorrow, right after breakfast. Thought we could head for Auckland and get to talk to people who speak English (sort of) again.

We could have some fush & chups when we get to Auckland. Your up very late skipper?