Brexit again............

[erimus]

Sums it up !!

Mr David Davis is at the golf club returning his locker key when Mr Barnier, the membership secretary sees him.

"Hello Mr Davis", says Mr Barnier. "I'm sorry to hear you are no longer renewing your club membership,if you would like to come to my office we can settle your account".

"I have settled my bar bill" says Mr Davis..

"Ah yes Mr Davis",says Mr Barnier, "but there are other matters that need settlement"

In Mr Barniers office Mr Davis explains that he has settled his bar bill so wonders what else he can possibly owe the Golf Club?

"Well Mr Davis" begins Mr Barnier, "you did agree to buy one of our Club Jackets".

"Yes" agrees Mr Davis "I did agree to buy a jacket but I haven't received it yet". "As soon as you supply the jacket I will send you a cheque for the full amount".

"That will not be possible" explains Mr Barnier. "As you are no longer a club member you will not be entitled to buy one of our jackets"!

"But you still want me to pay for it" exclaims Mr Davis.

"Yes" says Mr Barnier, "That will be £500 for the jacket. "There is also your bar bill".

"But I've already settled my bar bill" says Mr Davis.

"Yes" says Mr Barnier, "but as you can appreciate, we need to place our orders from the Brewery in advance to ensure our bar is properly stocked".. "You regularly used to spend at least £50 a week in the bar so we have placed orders with the brewery accordingly for the coming year". "You therefore owe us £2600 for the year".

"Will you still allow me to have these drinks?" asks Mr Davis.

"No of course not Mr Davis". "You are no longer a club member!" says Mr Barnier. "Next is your restaurant bill" continues Mr Barnier. "In the same manner we have to make arrangements in advance with our catering suppliers". "Your average restaurant bill was in the order of £300 a month, so we'll require payment of £3600 for the next year".

"I don't suppose you'll be letting me have these meals either" asks Mr Davis.

"No, of course not" says an irritated Mr Barnier, "you are no longer a club member!"

"Then of course" Mr Barnier continues, "there are repairs to the clubhouse roof".

"Clubhouse roof" exclaims Mr Davis, "What's that got to do with me?"

"Well it still needs to be repaired and the builders are coming in next week", your share of the bill is £2000".

"I see" says Mr Davis, "anything else?".

"Now you mention it" says Mr Barnier, "there is Fred the Barman's pension". "We would like you to pay £5 a week towards Fred's pension when he retires next month". "He's not well you know so I doubt we'll need to ask you for payment for longer than about five years, so £1300 should do it". "This brings your total bill to £10,000" says Mr Barnier.

"Let me get this straight" says Mr Davis, "you want me to pay £500 for a jacket you won't let me have, £2600 for beverages you won't let me drink and £3600 for food you won't let me eat, all under a roof I won't be allowed under and not served by a bloke who's going to retire next month!"

"Yes, it's all perfectly clear and quite reasonable" says Mr Barnier.

"P… off!" says Mr Davis

Now we understand what Brexit is all about!!!!!

geoff

[Malcolm G]

Very nice analogy.
The word divorce seems to used as well - Perhaps the voters should have been told that we would be required to pay alimony.

[ART6]

Excellent post!

[Dartskipper]

I see that Mr Bernier didn't mention the "Open Border" between the 18th Green and the Clubhouse.........

[Naytikos]

I have been wondering why the UK should be under any obligation to pay anything at all to get out of the EU; now, thanks to Erimus, I'm beginning to get the idea.


Having effectively decamped from the UK precisely because of the Common Market (as it was then called), I have no right to comment at all except in respect of any potential ramifications for the Overseas Territories. However I would not wish to see my remaining friends and relations saddled with a debt burden to support Brussels bureaucracy for years to come; in fact since VAT was imposed purely to fund payments into the EEC, once out it must surely be abolished leading to dramatic reductions in the cost of living and consequent enhancement of the economy.

[Dartskipper]

I don't think that our Department of the Treasury would be willing to revoke a tax that pulls in an extra 20% on every single transaction. I bet they still collect it, even though the revenue won't be sent to Brussels. The EU are trying to get us to help soften the blow to their income when our contributions cease. They never thought we would vote to leave.

[ceylon220]

Confused! why are we paying billions to exit the EU, cannot remember paying large amounts to join the EU or is this "Barmy Britain"--another soft touch ---we managed to survive before Ted Heath got us to join leaving our trade partners Australia and New Zealand to find trade elsewhere --to me this exit from Europe is a bloody rip off, why not tell them to bugg-r off and go it alone-- put the GREAT back into Britain.

[Quintero]

Thank you Erimus! I now understand, a lot better, the problems Mrs May has.
cheers

[Tomvart]

Outstanding post...still LMAO!
What a mess we have gotten ourselves into!

[Harlequin]

Originally Posted by Tomvart

Outstanding post...still LMAO!
What a mess we have gotten ourselves into!

We haven't, the politicians have.

[BobClay]

Brexit !!! ….. what's that ???

[James_C]

A better analogy as to current events would be Mrs May (Davis has gone of course) arriving at said golf club and insisting on using all the facilities but not wanting to pay anything.

[lakercapt]

Originally Posted by ceylon220

Confused! why are we paying billions to exit the EU, cannot remember paying large amounts to join the EU or is this "Barmy Britain"--another soft touch ---we managed to survive before Ted Heath got us to join leaving our trade partners Australia and New Zealand to find trade elsewhere --to me this exit from Europe is a bloody rip off, why not tell them to bugg-r off and go it alone-- put the GREAT back into Britain.

These markets now have got other countries taking their products and produce and that will not change. The setiments you have are similar to POTUS and not chance of succeeding!!!

[Harry Nicholson]

Juncker seems to be having a great time:
https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/676566...nk-on-the-job/

[Ron Stringer]

Originally Posted by BobClay

Brexit !!! ….. what's that ???

Brexit means ... er ... er ... er - ask the Prime Minister, I think she has an answer

[Ron Stringer]

Originally Posted by Harry Nicholson

Juncker seems to be having a great time:
https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/676566...nk-on-the-job/

Well the others are laughing so it wouldn't appear that he was ill; maybe the Sun has got something right for once.

[Tomvart]

According to the Beeb, he has sciatica - the 'half cut' story appeals more though!

[Tomvart]

Originally Posted by Harlequin

We haven't, the politicians have.

You might find that WE have played a part in this laughable fiasco too, as poorly bounded as it was - the referendum didn't just involve the politicians?

Everything after that - we can lay the blame squarely on our feckless politicians (of all parties).

Although I voted to remain in the referendum (for business reasons), I am now all for getting out and making a clean cut, after all - we joined the EEC, not a federal Europe with its strings being pulled from Berlin.

Perhaps DeGaulle had a point when he refused the UK access to the EEC in 1967!

[Engine Serang]

Originally Posted by ceylon220

Put the GREAT back into Britain.

What are your top ten items, great items, that you know will help in making Britain GREAT again?
I myself am struggling to come up with five.
It's good news to see that you have invaded Sri Lanka and brought the locals to their senses and persuaded them to revert to Ceylon, where the tea comes from. Lets all march on Kolkata and Nyasaland. Shaw Savill will be delighted to hear from you.

[Tomvart]

@#19. To be fair - I think Ceylon220's avatar is in reference to the cruiser HMS Ceylon, which was one of his favourite ships - I dont think he had plans on invading Sri Lanka!

[Harlequin]

Originally Posted by Tomvart

You might find that WE have played a part in this laughable fiasco too, as poorly bounded as it was - the referendum didn't just involve the politicians?

Everything after that - we can lay the blame squarely on our feckless politicians (of all parties).

Although I voted to remain in the referendum (for business reasons), I am now all for getting out and making a clean cut, after all - we joined the EEC, not a federal Europe with its strings being pulled from Berlin.

Perhaps DeGaulle had a point when he refused the UK access to the EEC in 1967!

Parliament (politicians) agreed overwhelmingly to offer the electorate a referendum on our EU status. Remain or leave was the choice, I (we) merely voted on the merits. So although I agree with almost all of your points, I still maintain that the politicians are the ones solely responsible for the mess we're in. We, the great unwashed merely exercised our democratic right to vote.
So without wanting to personalise this debate, the question I'd really like to ask you is,what part did I (we) play in this present sorry situation? Apart from voting against what the establishment wanted and expected.

[Tomvart]

Originally Posted by Harlequin

Parliament (politicians) agreed overwhelmingly to offer the electorate a referendum on our EU status. Remain or leave was the choice, I (we) merely voted on the merits. So although I agree with almost all of your points, I still maintain that the politicians are the ones solely responsible for the mess we're in. We, the great unwashed merely exercised our democratic right to vote.
So without wanting to personalise this debate, the question I'd really like to ask you is,what part did I (we) play in this present sorry situation? Apart from voting against what the establishment wanted and expected.

I absolutely dont want to personalise this debate either Harlequin and I take your point - and agree that other than voting one way or 'tother, we didn't play a huge part - nevertheless we did play a (small) part in the whole process.

Consider it this way - if the vote had of gone the other way, the nation would not be tearing itself apart under a weak leadership - and we would not be having this debate.

[Dartskipper]

Who was it who said "If you are afraid of the answer, don't ask the question?"

Mr Cameron should have thought a bit harder about how he was going to deal with the answer he didn't want. That he hadn't, became clear the following morning.

[Tomvart]

Hear Hear

[BobClay]

Somehow the plot has got reversed ….